Old sayings I just made up

  • As stable as a horse’s house
  • Darwin did not necessarily believe in God, but God sure-as-hell believes in Darwin.
  • Everyone is gifted in some ways and afflicted in others.
  • Entropy will get you sooner or later.
  • All women are crazy and all men are stupid.
  • Kissing your own ass puts you in a very odd position.
  • Never get caught doing a good deed.  (The “therefore” to “no good deed goes unpunished”).
  • Quality has a quantity all its own.
  • Make sure your chakra is aligned with your verkakte.
  • Life: the very definition of “a momentary lapse of reason”.
  • Sleep is practice for death.
  • Perfection is rarely perfect and is highly overrated.
  • If you think you are better than somebody else, you’re probably wrong.
  • Don’t never use no double negatives.
  • No amount of skill or artifice can offset any amount of bad leadership.
  • The meek shall inherit the earth, provided they are not eaten first.
  • My other universe is a holographic simulation.
  • PUFF-P– Pissing Up a Fucking Flag-Pole.
  • ‘Ware thee sycophants.
  • Any and every social occasion is vastly improved by my absence.
  • It’s better to have loved and lost, believe me.
  • Two people can share the same dream… if they are in love.
  • PTFO– Press The Fuck On.
  • Every last minute of life is bitter-sweet. That’s why humor and pain are so muddled.
  • I long for the shallows, for they are simple and warm in clime.  I shall never touch them, for once one has dove beneath the choppy surf he or she is cursed. To swim deeply, one is forever changed. The deep swimmer craves that which is facile, but can never return to the shallows. Having tasted of Tennison, Keats, Lovecraft, Chandler, Wilson, Vonnegut, Shakespeare and Wilde the diver is lost forever. Touch me, oh that which would make me superficial again.
  • It’s Unix, just like Mom used to make…
  • Any amount of ability is entirely eclipsed by any amount of arrogance, just ask Michael Lawless.
  • You should be content with being yourself, you can’t be anyone else.
  • Don’t think of it as death, think of it as wearing out one’s existential welcome.
  • A watched plot never embroils.
  • We are as we are shaped by others.
  • Code is truth.

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