Tag Archives: Team America World Police

Screenplay: Mars Attacks the Team America World Police! (the script just writes itself)

Scene 1: A flying saucer lands somewhere in a middle eastern desert, and a delegation of martians emerges. A group of local inhabitants who were nearby as the ship landed approaches cautiously.

Martian 1: (To the group of locals) Ack, ack ack ack!

Arabic Marionette 1: Durka durka durka?

Martian 2: Ack ack ack ack. Ack (gestures broadly at the surrounding dunes) ack ack ack ack.

Arabic Marionette 2: Durka durka (offers a skin of water to the first martian) durka. Durka durka.

Martian 1: AckĀ  (Takes skin of water, looks around in a confused manner and returns it).

Arabic Marionette 1: Durka!Durka durka durka durka durka. Durka durka durka.

Martian 2: Ack ack ack ack ack ack. Ack! Ack ack ack ack.

Martian 1: Ack ack ack.

Martian 3: Ack.

Arabic Marionette 1: Durka durka durka (wipes brow with sleeve) durka durka, durka durka durka.

Martian 2: Ack ack ack ack (raises a sidearm gesturing threateningly at Arabic Marionette 1).

Arabic Marionette 2: Durka durka, durka durka (makes gagging motions with hand) durka. Durka durka durka durka. Durka durka (raises right hand high above his head and pointing skyward) durka durka. Durka (lowers his hand to his side and spins in a complete circle) durka! Durka durka durka. DURKA! Durka durka.

Martian: Ack. Ack ack ack ack.

(The martian delegation turns to the ship and enters, the ship ascends to the sky, the locals watch in amazement).

Arabic Marionette 3: Durka!

Scene 2 (Aboard the martian ship)

Martian 1 (watching view screen of Earth as it falls into the distance): Ack ack ack.

Martian 4 (seated at control panel): Ack ack ack ack. Ack ack ack ack ack.

Martian 2 (looks askance at Marian 4 but says nothing).